[Richland] 3 Margaritas

I walk into 3 margarita I see rope and horn. The menu is laminated. The waiter gives us chips and says sole thing. Is it in English or Spanish?

Chips quickly. like an MRe of corn and the salsa is good. It has the spicy kick I need Jesus fucking Christ they brought us 3 bowls of chips for 5. Chips are warm. Like it.

Is there Long Island ice tea? Yes. I got a "tarantula nana" marg. My buddy got the Cadillac (Kadlec) marg. Everyone got their I’d checked except for me. Got checked and I gave her my credit card. I gotta say this tarantula marg is weak.

You would think in such a festive place they would have festive music. But no. It is silent in here. Respectful? Why my marg the only one with no shit on the rim

Bathroom - the wall is not flat. But the tile work intricately matches the contours of this fucked up wall. Toilet didn’t flush right and homie did damage.

Why are there so many people here? can Anyone tell if these tortillas are flour or corn?

Chimichanga. The rice is really good and it’s the most approachable thing. The he celery adds a lot to the meal. There is a difference between the pork and the asada. Gotta put my mask back on

Carne asade burrito - goddamn good. Taste like my dad grilled It out on the porch. I’m stuffed but this is good ass food.

Cheeseburger and fries - annoyed that I really like it. They put two slices of cheese on the patty. The meat ain’t exceptional but a cheeseburger is about the cheese and they did it right. You got the char - it’s like a deluxe Burger King burger. Something Springy about the Patty. The good thing I have to say about this cheeseburger - it had two slices of American cheese

Chills rellano - kinda tastes like an eraser. Wrapped in an egg? Not sure. Cole slaw taste like kfc. I’d rather have an almond milk than this dogshit

Fajitas all kinds - they ok it’s food, tastes like it’s supposed to taste. These are really ok fajitas. A trio of disappointment because all meats have the same textures

Aftermath: driving home I felt that urge. The one. Came home and erupted what was left undigested, which was a lot. Mi amigo got a hell of a 2 am hangover from those Kadlec margs.

Price: margarita $12 but hey the steak was good. 1 to 9 tarantualas out of 10

PaulHub explores facebook: "Reopen the Yakima Valley"

what's worse than the mexican dining experiences in eastern washington?

the people of eastern washington!

today paulhub brings you a look into the best of the worst group on facebook: "Reopen the Yakima Valley". this is a group full of freedom loving idiots abiding in yakima, the eastern WA county that has per capita the highest rate of coronavirus cases on the west coast

we are going to start by taking a look on how the friendly folk in the yakima valley enjoy hydroxychloroquine, open carrying, hot dogs, not wearing face masks, paying for things in cash, and how they really, really, really hate the governor of WA, jay inslee.

 healing crystals are sarah's preferred pain treatment

antifa possibly bussed in those kids 

janet's kink is letting her bare face hang free in public

big if true, charlie. i have a buddy who died because he skipped church for 3 weeks straight too

this yakima karen is packin a glock, and she wants to meet the hispanic guy's manager

the people in Reopen the Yakima Valley dont just waste their time posting on internet forums all day - they put their hands to work making some of the finest arts and crafts east of the cascades

here we have an oil painting of donald trump looking down in satisfaction as a younger, more boyish donald trump yeets joe biden so hard that the man loses all the color out his face. perhaps he is using the five point palm exploding heart technique. it should also be noted also that this scene takes place behind a starless american flag with one stripe. i never took any art symbolism classes so the depth and meaning is lost to me, but i'm sure there is a lot here to unpack.

giving and taking knowledge is a cornerstone of Reopen the Yakima Valley. until i found this community, i never knew that credit and debit cards were such a key part of the liberal's plan to overtake american rights. so when places around town starting moving cashless, Reopen the Yakima was having none of it

just wait until pizza hut makes you pay in bitcoin

handling a credit card is literally as unhygenic as eating ass

the dopes in Reopen the Yakima Valley generally play nice, but the heat gets turned up whenever any sort of liberalism is sniffed out 

 pat changed her ways to support BLM after this revelation

when it comes to research and hard science, you wont find a conservative facebook group more informed than Reopen the Yakima Valley

shelley here could write the fucking encyclopedia on herpes

this 86 post thread provides a deep dive into the science of farts

and i think i know how this guy got the name "dusty"

siegie makes the scientific method a part of her everyday life

as we mentioned at the top, if there's one thing the people of the yakima valley hate, its WA governor jay inslee. and bill gates (but we'll get there). here are a few names that the people of the yakima know governor inslee by:

- emperor inslee

- jaydolph hitler

- herr inslee

- ineptly

- kim jong inslee

- idiot inslee

- dimslee

- insbreed

- feckless jay

- jay enslave

- dumbslee

tony i understand that you're mad, but please lets not drag the nigerians into this

timmy i understand that your're mad, but please lets not drag... ummm... tyrael from diablo 2 into this

 

i wish these guys would drop the violence and take out their anger in a more healthy way. maybe something like oil painting. wait no

in the end, Reopen the Yakima Valley is full of grumpy conservative types who want life to get back to how things were (whatever that entails for yakima). however, there are a few brave citizens who have taken it upon themselves to wake eastern WA up to the secrets that control their lives. today we are going to end with a knowledge bomb from jerad. if you're brave enough to read, you'll find a story with a beginning, a middle, and an end, highlighting how bill gates and jay inslee are conspiring to control out lives with vaccines and microchips. take it away jerad

 

Reopen the Yakima Valley gets 0 face masks out of 10.

[The Dalles] Ixtapa *COVID-19 TAKEOUT SPECIAL*

The coronavirus (thanks 5G) has taken over the country and our PNW governors have closed the dining rooms across countless family casual mexican restaurants in WA and OR. hoy, we dip across the SE border (into oregon, no wall) to enjoy takeout at Ixtapa in the Dalles.


Aestetic: cholo guy fieri aestetics. beautiful paintings all over this place, makes me wish we sat in here instead of on the rock plains. One cannot turn their eyes away from the Ixtapa opus day, a beautiful chiquita carrying 7 ears of corn over a mexican landscape accented by mount hood. Here in the Ixtapa, art and fantasy await at every turn of the head














Bathrooms: good soap, dim lighting, hot water. Could I wash a viral species off my hands in here? probably? It would be peaceful to take a bath in here.


Takeout thoughts. No knives is a community grievance, really needed them. Big portions were nice. the sky looked like it didnt render properly



plains of Rohan, East WA.





Dilla - fine, but was not cut. provided a constant reminder that a quesadilla is a form of sandwich, Had to be folded up and eaten like a taco because no plastic knives. Good guac.







Chips and salsa - standard. don’t have good things to say about the salsa. Too much ragu. the chips did not taste any better after being refrigerated.







Fried burrito - Both of these fucking dudes thought they were getting fried chicken in their burrito for some reason. Description should be “Chicken burrito, fried”. There’s no fried bullshit in this burrito, just a fried tortilla. There’s some dispute going on of which burrito components were actually fried. Clearly not the sour creme. Moist.







Burrito vegetal - good, classic, a little watery, guac and pinto beans were high points. Mushrooms were cut thick.







Chimichanga was under salted. Or maybe it’s a chalupa? What’s the difference?





Chicken ranchero - greasy boy that I didn’t need but it was goddamn filling. a solid two-mealer. Refried beans are a concerning shade of white beneath the melted cheese













Asada - I should have had a knife. Four tortillas was good, but the meal was kinda average. A solid positive on the tortilla. $20 was a lil steep.





Dessert: the gumballs at the dispenser here were GAS. I've never chewn a quarter-machine gumball and thought to myself "damn these taste fresh" before this experience.


second dessert - andes mints. Have you ever thought you shit yourself, but didnt shit yourself? dont leave andes mints in your pocket on a warm spring day. cleaning supplies are hard to find these days. the worst part was I didnt even get to eat any of the chocolate :(








Final thoughts: 4.5 chocolate car fobs out of 10. tasted like a Mexican restaurant in the Dalles, better than Mexican restaurants in England. standard to meh, yet comfortingly familiar, experience inspite of these trying times

[Mattawa] La lunchera veloz

La lunchera veloz 

The ol google pulled a switcharoo on me. Thought I was going to a restaurant called “restaurat la pasadia”, which I was drawn to because the 10 of the 13 google pictures were selfies of some dude in an Oakland raiders hat. I liked one of his photos and he took them all down though, some people just don’t wanna shine. I have a lot of questions about the decor and the quality of the HVAC work in this place

The proprietor of this place was very friendly. We were seated in a large empty ballroom. 

Drinks: they don’t sell anything except Jaritos and beer and I really love it. Corona came with a lime and I really like it

Condiments: I like that they have tapatio but I would not eat anything that comes out of this hole. This is the kind of shit middle school kids in Florida dare each other to suck out of. 

Carne asada. - looks straight up delectable. With my dirty ass hands I ate the shit out of this. 10/10 meat 5/10 rice and beans. Came with the spicy pepper 

Burger - yo how does this random ass Mexican restaurant in Mattawa make the meanest looking burger I’ve seen in my life. This plate got a royal welcome. People straight up mad that they didn’t order a burger

Burrito- made my man happy. Green sauce for the side is some Tangy green good stuff. Food so good we ordered more. A burger with a purpose.

Quesadilla - “all of my hopes and dreams” they took the rice and beans before we finished them all; the table was crushed 

They fed our vegetarian a meal with no vegetables. And she was extremely happy 

Tacos: wanted to take them back for meal prepping. Couldn’t resist eating them here tho. 

Enchiladas: not much to say, but good overall. Usually you get the mushed up beans, but these were like beans. Not refried. I’m not sure why. 8.3 out of 10.7 

Really well proportioned. Great price. Meal and beer was less than $20. 

I feel like I had a fever after leaving the shitter.  was no

• toilet seat
• LIGHTS
• door knob
• Paper towels

You have to do your business in the darkness or leave the bathroom door open and have everyone watch you do your business like a disgusting animal. I have good aim but I don’t trust the average Mattawan to not piss wildly all over that place. My amigo needs to shit and there’s no TP :( but there is a nice dirty mop bucket in there. Soap quality and the flow rate on the sink were pretty stellar, but the lack of light left my hands nearly as dirty as they were when I walked in. They take no smoking pretty seriously here. There are more no smoking signs than “employees must wash hands” someone who enjoyed both bathrooms insisted the women’s room soap was of a lower quality than the men’s room soap

 

Women’s restroom is pretty nice I’ve been told. 

Final thoughts - the best of Mattawa, Paulhub’s first winner